Tantra and Relationship

Q. Maya writes: So please tell me, how can tantra help me and my husband?

A. Well, where to begin? The benefits of Tantric meditation with a partner or potential partner are so numerous. Most therapists acknowledge that communication is the key to a healthy relationship. While this is true, the approaches to authentic communication tend to center almost solely on mental / verbal thereapuetic techniques. Certainly, skills such as active listening are very important to understanding, and I do teach and unitize these in my counseling.

Taoist Tantra
In Taoist Tantra we realize that a mental / verbal approach is not the only, and perhaps not even the most efficient, modality for facilitating communication. If you think about it, the root of this word is “commune,” which certainly can imply a deeper connecting than talking usually achieves. To be in communion is a state of total unity: heart and mind, body and soul. This happens first within oneself, then with another, finally between you and the Divine.

The emotions are often inflamed and in confusion. The mind may also be confused and seek to create “stories” or self directed “movies” about the experience of mental and / or emotional confusion, to rationalize, to defend our position and our confusion. When, as is fairly typical, we come to relationship “wounded” and fragmented within ourselves, this relating will always present to us “learning” or “healing” opportunities. We need to recognize the opportunity when presented and develop the skills necessary to transmute what we experience as confusion or wounding into freedom and wisdom.

The Body Never Lies
The body, on the other hand, never lies. It doesn’t know how to. Our experience, our life, is always truthfully written to the “hard drive” of the body, albeit in a “Somatic Code.” I often think of this as kind of our own personal “DaVinci Code.” This is certainly the basis of Bioenergetic Analysis, Neo Rechian, and other similar growth processes. Since the body is the repository of the truth of our experience in our lives, it would behoove ourselves to become Present and decipher the code. By doing this, we will attain ever greater freedom and wisdom. Taoist Tantra works to reunite the mind, body, emotions, and spirit while providing you with many pleasant techniques to become Present, which is key to self knowledge.

Knowledge of Self is crucial both to spiritual evolution and high level relationships. Whether you intend to go through life solo, or to create a conscious relationship, first “know thyself.” Understanding what makes yourself tick will empower your personal responsibility, understanding, empathy, and compassion. If your partner has similar skills, or desires to, then there will be less and less energy spent in conflict, and more invested in contented bliss.

Taoist Tantra Activates, Transmutes, and Harmonizes
In Taoist Tantra we first activate Qi (Chi, life force), which powers our bodies, emotions, mind, and sexuality. We then transmute and circulate this energy via certain Tantric techniques. We attune to, and harmonize with, both our disparate “selves” and our connection to our present or potential partner. At this point we can unify ourselves and deeply come into union (Communion) with another and with the Divine. We can be Awakened, be Present, free from the past (karma), free from expectations and anxieties, whether conscious or subconscious, about what is to come.

If you are a single person with a solitary yoga or Taoist practice and desirous of personal growth, or if you are seeking to harmonize with another in a relationship, you are part of the same spectrum of self realization that Taoist Tantric practices help you achieve. I would invite you and your husband to participate in our Taoist Tantra offerings. Let the journey begin! © 2006 Keith E. Hall

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Tags: Bioenergetics, presencing, relationships, Tantra, taoist tantra

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